Do you know the secret ingredient in every healthy family?

In our experience working with hundreds of families, there is one common denominator in every family that is considered healthy. Yes, that’s a big statement and yet in another sense it’s not a big surprise. Especially as I write this on the eve of Easter. Tomorrow we will celebrate what Jesus Christ did on the cross for each and every one of us. The bad news of the gospel message is because of sin we face a broken relationship with God. The good news of the gospel is the cross makes it possible for that relationship to be restored. That is the Easter celebration!

John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” That’s the gospel message and we can talk more about that another day.

Family relationships can get very complicated

Healthy families, whether they realize it or not, have learned to re-enact the gospel with each other. Healthy families have learned the secret of forgiveness. Every relationship in your family will eventually be broken. It happens because we are human, because we sin, and because we are selfish. Eventually we will hurt each other… guaranteed!

The only question is what we do next. Healthy families, even if they deny the existence of God, learn to follow God’s example. No, we don’t have to die on a cross; Jesus already did that for us. But we do have to apologize, repent, and ask for forgiveness. And then, we have to be willing to extend forgiveness when we are the one wronged. Books have been written on the subject of forgiveness. Let me give you five reasons why it’s so important for families to practice the art of forgiveness.

• The bible clearly instructs us to forgive one another. As God has forgiven us we are to forgive one another. To keep clear with each other isn’t just a good idea, it’s God’s idea.
• We miss out on parts of the relationship when we are burdened with un-forgiveness. When our relationships are tense, it’s hard to enjoy the good things happening in the family. How do you celebrate a victory or an award your sibling receives when there is bitterness in the air?
• Forgiveness is good for the forgiver. Someone once said to withhold forgiveness is like drinking poison and hoping it will kill someone else. Our motive to forgive should be obedience and love of God. However, to carry around un-forgiveness does indeed eat away at us.
• It prepares us for the coming storms. Every family experiences storms. Your family’s ability to successfully weather the storms increases exponentially if you have practiced the principle of forgiveness. You personally could find yourself at the eye of the storm. If you have unresolved conflicts with the rest of the clan it’s hard to reach out to them for support. We have an e-book coming out shortly on family storms.
• There is an enemy and he will do anything to keep you from forgiving one another. The last thing satan wants is a for a watching world to see a family modeling the gospel message with each other.

This Easter season, be grateful for the forgiveness we find in the cross. Then, practice forgiveness with those in your family. Do you need to apologize for something? Do you need to forgive someone? Do it today.

We are moving our blog and website one more time in the next several days. It shouldn’t affect anything on your end, but just in case we wanted to give all of you a heads up. Thanks for reading and please share this with a friend.

 

The most important character quality to teach your child athlete

 

I (David) remember the scene well. Our oldest son Tavita, was crouched on the sideline with his head down. He was discouraged after losing our third game in a row. After a promising start to the season, he was taking more than his fair share of the blame for our losses. Now he didn’t feel like he could face our fans for the post-game thank-yous.

Celebrating with Tavita after beating our rivals just 2 weeks after the devastating loss

Maybe you’ve heard it said; athletics teaches character. Or perhaps you’ve benefited from the teachable moments sports can afford. Or you might be that parent intent on using athletics and not letting athletics use your kid. Regardless, have you ever considered what the most important thing you want your child to take away from athletics? At the very least, what is the one critical character quality athletics has a way of teaching your child, perhaps better than anything else?

In athletics, as in life, you need character. Certainly we want to teach our children Godly character. Sports is a great place to learn things like hard work, teamwork, diligence, sacrifice etc. But these character qualities require one particular character in order to be lived out – and that’s the character of self-control. Think about it, we know what we need to do; we just need the self-discipline to actually do it. If your child isn’t interested in athletics, whatever activity they are involved in, make sure they’re learning self-control.

Here are some practical ways for your athlete to learn self-control:

• Go to practice – make sure they go on time and ready to work especially when they don’t feel like it. Once the newness and excitement of joining the team leaves, what is left often times is the self-control to keep at it.
• 24 Hour Rule – After a loss or a big win we gave our kids 24 hours to deal with the emotion. They couldn’t be mean or disrespectful, but we allowed them a little space to process and get control.
• Partner with their coaches – We know you are going to struggle with some coaches (read our blog on coaches). Be wise but don’t rescue your child every time they disagree with what the coach has done. Often the character gained is far more valuable than the playing time they missed.
• Let them know you are in their corner – in the story I told above, I wanted to help Tavita escape embarrassment, but I knew it was a defining moment. I told him there would be better days. I also told him I’d go with him. We loved going to watch our kids when they won. But we knew it was more important to be there when they lost or if they got beat out or when they were discouraged.

We love athletics and what it has taught our kids. We’re not happy with some of the ways it seems to be trending. We continue to believe it’s an incredible tool to teach your child character… especially if you have the self-control to journey through it with them.

What was the greatest sports moment for your child? What was the hardest? What was your response?

5 Things my husband taught me about mothering our sons

“He will not call you or answer your calls like the girls do!” my husband David said! I was surprised and hurt at this suggestion!! Our third child, but first son, was leaving for college and David was trying to prepare me for the differences between sons and daughters leaving home.

With Tana during mom’s weekend

Our first to go were girls, our two daughters. I talked with them practically every day. Not long conversations, just quick updates on something fun or hard or new or surprising… just a touch point… a connection. I could not imagine this son of mine was leaving after 18 years and might not respond to my calls in this same fashion!! Even more disturbing was David’s suggestion (ok maybe a little stronger than a suggestion) I not call him!!

It was a defining moment in my mothering of sons. I had a close, loving, respectful and what I would consider influential relationship with my son. My emotions fought to argue; but a gentle, soft voice in me knew I was entering new territory.

I am so thankful I made a decision long ago in my marriage to invite David in to coach me on things he knew more about than me; how to be a man was one of those things!!

At puberty (13), at the conclusion of our sons’ rite of passage, David declares our boys to be men; young men still in need of parenting and direction, but men. He explains we will now treat them differently and they will now act differently because they are men!! For me it meant I no longer was to manage their lives. Yes, I still parented, but natural consequences did more of the teaching and the disciplining. I might say, “Is there anything I can do to help?” But my job was not to nag, punish or reward them for things they could clearly do on their own.

Here are 5 things David taught me about mothering our sons after their rite of passage.

1)Use a tone of respect in conversation; speak directly and teach rather than condescend and judge.

2)Teach him about the differences between male and female wiring – how his dad’s male wiring has influenced me by broadening my perspective. How I love being valued and protected by a man.

3)Affirm his manliness by asking him for his opinions, for help requiring brute strength and catching and praising him for doing things a good husband and father would do.

4)Remind him he is way more than just a sexual being. He’s intelligent, emotional, spiritual, relational, and goal oriented. To not let women use or evaluate him as a sexual performer or consumer.

5)Lastly, I could follow his father because his father was following Christ. Jesus alone has the plan and the basis for who he is. He is the one who gives you what you need to weather the storms of life. Give Him all the glory.

I am so grateful my husband is my best coach on how to mother our sons. And the bonus is, I get to sleep with the coach. Today my sons call and talk for a while. They answer all my questions and they even tell me they love me!!

Have you seen a difference raising your sons vs. your daughters? What’s your favorite tip for mothers with sons? Remember to sign up to follow our blog.

Why you should raise all your kids to be a quarterback

“That’s it! I’m going to raise a quarterback.” I remember the day I made that bold and naive statement. I was coaching at a high school in southwest Washington. The coaches had just come off the field and we were frustrated at how little our quarterbacks seemed to understood the basic elements of playing that key position. My oldest son Tavita was in 4^th grade so I made the decision I was going to raise him to be a quarterback. What I discovered changed my parenting forever.

“Coach” Tavita on the sideline with Andrew Luck

As I looked into what it took to be a great quarterback most of what I read about had nothing to do with throwing or running with a football. Obviously a quarterback had to be able to throw and have some athletic ability. But I heard most often about were things like, leadership, confidence, self-control, able to handle pressure, decision making, smart, tough, respected, integrity. Doesn’t that sound more like someone running for president? Or maybe you shouldn’t answer that question.

I’ve had the privilege of coaching my three oldest boys. They have all been quarterbacks. In fact, 9 out of the last 10 years our high school team has had a Pritchard at quarterback. The oldest, Tavita was blessed with some physical abilities that enabled him to make it to the college level as a quarterback. He started two years at Stanford University. He would have been the most experienced quarterback in the Pac-10 his senior year. That is until he lost his spot to a freshman kid named Andrew Luck.

Today Tavita coaches the quarterbacks at Stanford. So he flies all over the country looking for young men that possess all these qualities. Of course most kids aren’t destined to be the next Andrew Luck. In fact most kids won’t end up playing quarterback for their high school team, much less in college or the pros. In their research, for the book Revolutionary Parenting, the Barna group discovered that 100% of the parents of Spiritual Champions (a term they coined) said teaching Godly character was the most important thing. So yes, you should raise your kids to be a quarterback – just feel free to skip the football drills!

Let me leave you with the big three. All the character qualities are important, but we have found these three to be the most critical when it comes to raising spiritual champions (or quarterbacks).

• Self-control – we actually teach this as one of the three most important things to teach your child. It takes self-control to live out the other character qualities.
• Leadership – we are raising “nice” Christian kids. We want kids to be kind, but we also want them to stand up and lead, especially when so many are following the wrong voices.
• Integrity – lining up what they know in their head, with what they believe in their heart, with what they do in their actions.

With or without a football, these are great qualities to parent into our children. Start early and don’t give up. Maybe you’ll never have a quarterback, but you’ll have something better – a spiritual champion.

Do you agree with our “Big Three” or do you have a different three? We’d love to hear from you. Also, if you subscribe to our blog you will receive an email every time we post a new article.

5 Questions to help you through those Tense Talks with your Teenager

I (Kelli) could feel my heart begin to beat harder. I’m sure there was sweat forming on my brow. My high school freshmen daughter was sharing the discussion her teammates were having on the bus ride home from their game. The conversation had been graphic and sexual.  She had questions about what these girls were saying.  She was trying to process all she had heard. I kept thinking, “This isn’t exactly how I wanted her to learn about these matters.”

Maybe you’ve experienced something like this or maybe you’re worried one day you will. What do we do when our teenagers come to us with “shocking” information? Like the time my son told us kids at school had offered him drugs. What do you say?

Parenting exposes us in so many unique ways.  Sometimes the things our teens present us will push on areas we might be struggling with or feel inadequate in or simply unprepared to address.  

I am way better if I have a chance to process with David and think through my responses. But sometimes, like on this occasion with my daughter, I didn’t have time for either.  She wanted to know truth. And it’s not that we hadn’t considered the tension in teaching sexuality because we certainly had. But suddenly I was presented with a hard conversation and no time to prepare.

When these moments happen, and they will, here are five questions to have ready. They will help your teen process what is going on and more importantly help them begin to learn how to process independently. After all, the goal is for our teens to be self-governing and be able to navigate these waters without us (but that’s a topic for another blog). Keep in mind this isn’t an exhaustive list. These will just help get you started.

1. What do you think is the right thing to do? 

 

2. What parts of this can you own?
3. How can dad and I help you?
4. What does God think? Do you mind if I pray for you?
5. What do you think dad and I think about this and why do you think we have landed there? 

Again, there are certainly more and perhaps better questions. The point is, how we respond when our teen comes to us will determine whether or not they come back the next time. Practice saying, “That’s interesting, tell me more,” and “thank-you for inviting us into this with you.” 

This privileged place is not permission to lecture or to tell our kids what to think, but rather to really listen and learn what they are saying to themselves about what has happened. How much better when they ask us, “Mom, dad, what do you think?”

 And remember, it’s not just behavior we are after, we are after the heart of our teen, and that too is a topic for another day. What has been the most shocking news your teen has brought to you? What did you do when it happened? We’d love to hear from you.

How to raise kids that are HONEST and KIND with each other.

Our oldest daughter was the first to leave home for college. A thousand miles away she called us. “Mom, dad,” she said, “My professor is 180 degrees diametrically opposed to everything you’ve ever taught me.” We had to think quickly. If we over-reacted she might never feel safe in sharing the truth with us again. If we didn’t react at all, she might think we actually agreed with her professor. It was time to practice what we’d always preached.

When Ephesians 4 speaks of growing mature in every way it says we must, “speak the truth in love.” But many times one or the other pulls for our affection. If we’ve been hurt, we want truth. We want the hammer of justice to come down hard on the person who has wronged us. If we’ve done the hurting then we say, “God is love. You have to forgive me.” Which is right? And the answer is… yes!

Teaching our kids to be HONEST and KIND isn’t done overnight. Here are six keys:

• You must model it. You knew that was coming. If you two are screaming at each don’t expect your kids to be nice to each other. Or how about this one. Have you ever said seriously, “don’t tell your father”?
• Be HONEST. This is like the first one. You must practice being truthful to your kids. When they are young do you tell them little “white lies” because it’s easier than the truth? It’s ok to say, I’ll tell you more when the time is right. But to say, “I don’t know” if you do, or “they were out,” when they weren’t, eventually catches up to you. Tell them the truth, even when it’s hard.
• Be KIND. I remember the days of yelling at my kids. Most of the time, I was probably right. They should have listened or stopped or done what I asked. But as we learned to parent with a gently and loving voice we began teaching our kids kindness. Because true kindness isn’t just when everything is great. In fact you can discipline nicely. “I’m so sorry you chose to do that. We really wanted you to be able to be with us, but now you are going to have to stay home.”
• Place value in HONEST and KIND. If you’re like me you’re going to mess up with your spouse or your kids. If it’s important, then it’s important enough to say I’m sorry, please forgive me.
• Teach them what to say and how to say it. Teach your kids phrases for how they might approach a hard conversation. If they need to tell someone something truthful but hard, coach them up.
• Use family meetings and after dinner conversation to cast vision. Family meetings are great opportunities to ask, “What kind of a family do we want to be.” It’s hard to always be honest, but if you’ve decided together as a family, “We are going to do this,” it’s way more likely to happen.

It’s almost a lost art to speak truth in love. As a culture we are angry. So when we speak truth we feel justified to do so in anger. Ephesians 4 doesn’t give you license to be “brutally” honest with those closest to you. On the other hand if we choose to be kind we assume it means we can’t be honest. Instead let’s teach our kids to be HONEST with each other and to do it with KINDNESS! How have you seen this lived out in your home? What helped your kids live out Ephesians 4?

How to make sure your child gets all the playing time they deserve

Are your kids involved in athletics? Do you worry about the amount of playing time they are getting? Is their coach unfair in the way he determines the amount of game time your child receives? I’m starting a series on raising an athlete. Today I want to share with you the secret to getting your child all the playing time they deserve. I’ve spent the last 40+ years of my life playing, coaching, and parenting in the world of athletics. And I’ve come to the conclusion parenting an athlete might very well be the most challenging of all the aspects in athletics.

Being an athlete has its moments. Every athlete has experienced the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. I know as a coach there have been moments I felt my head or heart or both would explode. Each role can be incredibly wonderful and extremely frustrating. But both the athlete and the coach have some level of control. Each has direct opportunity to impact the way a game is played or a season unfolds.
A parent however, and especially the higher up the athletic ladder your child climbs, has little to no say in what happens on a field of play. Sure when our kids are little and we are helping with their T-ball team, we have some control. But as they move into middle school and high school athletics, unless we happen to be on the coaching staff, our input and influence diminishes greatly.
If you are reading this post in hopes of gaining three practical tips for handling your child’s &$%@* coach, then you are going to be disappointed. Let me give you the sobering truth. In your child’s lifetime they will have many different coaches – especially if they are multi-sport athletes. Very few of those coaches, if any, will be great. Most will be ok and many are likely to be awful. Of course some parents spend a lot of time and money to hand select the best coaches and programs – but that carries its own unique challenges.
Athletics is a great opportunity for your child to compete, have fun, learn about people, and grow in multiple ways. It’s also an incredible source for teachable moments. But the greatest impact on your child will be how you help them journey through the experience. Playing time complaints tend to fall into three categories:
• My child’s playing time
• All kids should get equal playing time
• The better kids should play more so we can win
If you child believes the reason they are participating is playing time and winning, they will spend these years in the shallow end of an enormously deep pool. Don’t get me wrong, I like winning. Over the years I’ve won more than I’ve lost. But I want my kids to know there is so much more to gain from athletics.
The secret to getting your child all the playing time they “deserve” is stop evaluating the season by playing time. It doesn’t mean there won’t be time a meeting with the coach is necessary (more in a future blog). But help your child embrace the joy of being a part of the team. Even with an awful coach, your child can get something positive by being a leader or supporting a teammate. And there is a difference between an awful coach and an awful person. As a parent, especially of young kids, I won’t expose my child for a full season to a coach that crosses certain lines. I’m talking about things that have nothing to do with shooting a basketball or throwing a football (more in a future blog as well).
I’ve had frustrating years. I’ve watched my child work harder, have a better attitude, learn all the plays, make all the practices and still not get the amount of playing time she “deserved”. There were times I wanted to explain a few things to the coach. James 4 reminds us why we quarrel and fight; because we desire but don’t have. We justify our rage in the name of loving our child. Often our child is fine – we are the one’s struggling because of our expectations. Learn to lovingly support your child, not by helping them complain, but rather by helping them understand their experience is about way more than just playing time. As Paul reminds us in Philippians 4, the secret to being content and getting what you deserve lies not in more playing time, but in this: “13I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
What struggles have you faced as a parent with your athlete? Any situation you wish you would have handled differently?

Why the Best Marriages Fight With Each Other!

It may sound like a crazy idea, but it’s true. The best marriages fight with each other. Of course, what’s important isn’t the fight; it’s what they fight about. I remember when we were young parents with young children. In addition to raising our kids we were business owners trying to make it in the pizza industry. We were TIRED! Do I hear a collective “Amen” out there among you parents of infants?

                  Try keeping up with these two… “exhausting!”

Maybe you’ve experienced that familiar scene. Your baby hasn’t slept all that well throughout the day. She’s a little cranky (Yes Alyse, I’m talking about you). You are looking forward to finally getting her to bed so the two of you can visit and get a good night sleep. Your visit is short because you’re both exhausted. The minute your head hits the pillow you’re out. Your dream of sandy beaches in Hawaii is suddenly shattered by the cry of your baby.

In the name of full disclosure, there “might” have been times I pretended to not hear the baby and laid perfectly still in hopes Kelli would wake up with our child. But as I began to grow up and our marriage strengthened, it wasn’t unusual for an argument to break out. Only the argument went a little like this:
Kelli: “I’ve got her.”
Me: “No, I’m happy to get up.”
Kelli: “No, you’ve got a long day today.”
Me: “No, you barely had any sleep last night.”
And you get the idea.
The best marriages fight. But they fight on behalf of their spouse. Shanti Feldhahn in her latest book which I highly recommend, The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages, shares a similar idea. In a chapter titled “Keep Score”, she says, “Consciously or subconsciously, partners in highly happy marriages keep score of what they “owe” their spouses.” Then, she says, they will make it a point to “compensate” their partner.
So in the same way that Kelli and I would fight on behalf of each other, Feldhahn says the happiest couples keep score, but they keep score of all the good things their spouse has done. Of course half the battle, in the busyness of life is to just notice all the things your husband or wife is doing for your family. Too often out of our selfishness we keep track of what we’ve done and carry grudges. That’s a guarantee for trouble in a marriage.
Instead, what would your marriage look like if you each were trying hard to never “owe” the other person – to out give them? Rather than keeping track of the things they haven’t done, you notice what they have done. I promise if you both do that, arguments will break out as you wrestle to out give your mate. But that’s a fight that will lead to a strong and healthy marriage.
Have you and your spouse had any of these “fights”? We’d love to hear about them.

How My Husband Saved My Son From Surgery

In the hospital he was known as the “Dishwasher Kid”!

It was the phone call every parent dreads. We had left our daughter Jordan(17) in charge of getting the kitchen cleaned and supervising her four younger siblings. Not due to any horseplay, Keila(11) fell onto a ten inch knife sticking up the wrong way in our dishwasher. We got the call, for the first time in raising our eleven kids, we were headed to the emergency room.

Good Morning!! Grab your coffee and join me for a short break!

After about four hours of assessment, the pediatric surgeon came in and said ,”This is what we are going to do…” She explained how they were going to open up Keila’s abdomen for exploratory surgery. Keila was doing fine, but they wanted to make sure there was no internal bleeding or more importantly a puncture of the intestines. Without hesitation, David spoke up directly and confidently, “Isn’t there anything a little less invasive that could be done?”

I immediately think, this is the doctor you’re questioning. I was also a little concerned they’d question our motives for not wanting our child to be taken care of. After all, our son is laying there with a stab wound! At that moment, I looked at David and had to answer a very important question. Was I going to support my husband in this conversation?

Before I share the end of the story, I want to share five reasons why parenting out of a deep one flesh relationship is so important, especially in a crisis.

1. The best decisions are made from a unique blend of both our wiring. Each of our perspectives are shared, heard and taken into consideration as we are faced with storms, crisis or simple decisions that must be made.
2. Trust and respect for each other allows you to come up with options that weren’t even being considered. Brainstorming within a safe and trusted relationship means the sky is the limit to how we will approach and respond to all this life will throw at us…even a stabbing of our son by the dishwasher.
3. Storms have the potential to build intimacy. During our parenting life, we used the hard times to work at staying connected. We tried to listen well to each other, making sure we love and respect each other. Especially when it would be so easy to do the opposite.
4. Accountability to do the right thing. Who can’t be nice and honoring to your spouse when everything is peachy? The storms of life give us a chance to treat each other well but also to resolve differing opinions in a way that we can support each other especially if we make the wrong decision.
5. Lastly and most importantly, we have incredible opportunity to bear the image of who God is. People are watching us… our kids, the hospital staff, and strangers. Many had front row seats to how we were responding to each other and to the staff as well as to Keila.

They were able to come up with a less invasive option. Keila didn’t have surgery. Today he’s totally recovered from a damaged spleen. As important, I have never been so grateful for my relationship with my husband. We are a good team…and I am so thankful we had an opportunity to honor each other in a very tense and serious situation.

Have you had one of those times when you and your spouse had to trust each other in making a hard decision? How did it go? What did you learn?

5 Things Every Man Must Do To Lovingly Lead His Home

Everybody has an opinion about men. Men need to grow up. Men need to lead. Men need to just love their wives. According to the bible men are called to be servant leaders of their home (Eph 5:22, Col 3:18, 1 Cor 11:3). How we live that out has caused mini wars between men and women for thousands of years. Men, here are 5 things you must do.

Men ~ Our families are looking to us for leadership!

1) Do the right thing – The bible says this;
He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God – Micah 6:8
It takes a courageous man to act justly no matter what. Part of leading is doing the right thing even when it’s hard to do. It often seems simpler to lie, or cheat, or ignore the truth. Godly leadership does the harder thing… the right thing. It’s a matter of integrity.
2) Love mercy – We are to act justly, but we are to love mercy. The love chapter in 1 Corinthians 13 reminds us, “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.” Do the right thing… but do it with love. Leading your family sometimes requires tough decisions. But the heart of the Godly man is love for his wife and love for his children.
3) Courageously Confront Evil – Leo Tolstoy is credited with the quote, “All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing”. Part of being a Godly leader is the willingness to confront evil. The message we model to our wife and kids when we do nothing about evil in our sphere of influence weakens their view of our commitment to truth. Men like William Wilberforce, Dietrich Bonhoeffer and Martin Luther King, Jr. give us models of confronting evil at the risk of everything.
4) Die for your wife – We are to love our wives as Christ loved the church (Christ died for the church). Much is made of the call for women to submit to their husbands. It’s interesting more isn’t made of the call for men to die for their wives. A couple of years ago we heard the story of a newlywed couple. One night the roads were icy. This couple’s car slid over an embankment and down a hill. They got out to assess the damage when another car did the exact same thing. They were standing behind their car when the second car came barreling down the hill right at them. Alert, the young husband shoved his wife out of the way just as the second vehicle came crashing into their car. The young man was crushed between the two vehicles and died. Many men are prepared to give up their life to protect their wife or kids. But are we willing to die daily for our wives. In other words, to put to death our own agendas and serve our wife. Jesus called us to be servant leaders. That’s what real men do when leading their families.
5) Lead – I know. Sound’s ridiculous. But the key to leading is to intentionally lead. Seek direction from the Lord. Then be bold and courageous as you cast vision for your family. If your marriage needs help you take the lead. If you need help in parenting then you take the lead. If finances are a problem you lead the way. If your family’s health isn’t where it should be then you set some goals for your home. And spiritually, you assume the role of pastor and lead your family.
Obviously for those who are married, this all happens in partnership with your wife. And remember, it isn’t about perfection it’s about being faithful. You won’t always do it right, you won’t always show mercy, you won’t courageously confront evil every time, you won’t serve your wife perfectly, and you’ll drop the ball when it comes to leading. But be faithful to keep at it. Men, what has been the hardest part of leading for you? And wives, I’d love to hear some stories of how your husbands have been servant leaders in your home.